Comic Book Onomatopoeias Part ITHWIPP
I suppose the way I should be assigning bullets to these things is by whether or not, when spoken, they sound like the actual sound from, you know, the world. The problem with "thwipp" then is that it is a sound effect that was created for something that is original to the comic, not of some world-happening occurrence--it's the sound of Spider-Man's web being shot. So, I don't think of IT sounding like SOMETHING ELSE as much as I think that, in movies and cartoons, the sound effects used should match it. For instance, in the "Spider-Man" movie, rather than kind of a squishy sound, the effect used for Spider-Man's webspinning should have been a guy saying "thwipp." Because THAT'S WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE. Plus 7 bullets.
BAMPF
When you compare this onomatopoeia to its counterpart, the simple "BAM," you have to realize its superiority. For the love of God man, there's an extra "PF," so you know that the impact is that much harder. Sure, you can get hit with a "BAM" and feel it, I mean, really feel it, and it'll hurt, but when the "BAMPF" comes at you, when you really get the "BAMPF," man, expect to have to sit down for a few minutes. Plus 4 bullets.
BATANG
This is the commonly used ricochet sound effect, for when a bullet bounces off a wall or Batman's Batarang goes flying off of one of those giant vats of acid, 'cause you know Batman's always fighiting around giant vats of acid for one reason or another. I have to say that "BATANG" is one of my least favorite comic book onomatopoeias, simply because nothing is as good as the actual sound of bullets bouncing off of metal. A lot of times, I prefer the comics sound, like I prefer "RRRRRRUMBLE" quite a bit to the actual sound of rumbling. But "BATANG" just doesn't live up to its counterpart. Minus 3 bullets.
SKREEE
I like "SKREEE" a lot, simply because it can be used for so many things. A whole bunch of sound effects are specific to one sound and that's it, but "SKREEE" can be the sound of tires screeching, or of just a really loud banshee wail, or of fingernails on a chalkboard. And better yet, it actually matches up pretty well with all those real-life sounds. I mean, "SKREEE" is so freakin' versatile, I think I could probably use it for about 30% of all comic book onomatopoeias and do alright. Plus 5 bullets.
VRRRRRRRMMMM
I'm not a big fan of this one, simply because it's so unnecessary. As of late, it seems that comics have been trying to phase out the whole onomatopoeia business in a good many books, so as to give them a darker edge. Yeah, they still use them in some of the lighter-harted books, but the darker books are getting rid of them faster and faster. And, deservedly so, "VRRRRRRRMMMM" was one of the first to go. I mean, yeah, we get it, the car's moving. We can tell that by the fact that the car is in a different place than it was a panel before. You don't have to obstruct my view of Black Cat to let me know that. Minus 4 bullets.
ZORT
Here's the thing about "ZORT." It's a 1960's Batman TV series onomatopoeia. Granted, the show did have some redeeming qualities--namely the guest stars that played villians, like Burgess Meredith as the Penguin, Caesar Romero as the Joker, and Vincent Price himself as Egghead, which I dare to say no other actor could pull off--but one of the worst, and I mean WORST parts of the show was the requisite fight with villainous thugs that took place. This is so for two reasons: 1) Because it meant that the villain always had to say something effeminate like, "Sic em, boys!" or "Get those brutes!" and 2) Because it was spliced with graphics of words like "ZORT" and "ZAPPO" and "DAVID BOWIE." Ick. Minus 8 bullets.
So, comic book onomatopoeias end up with positive one bullet. But then, there are two parts to this, so I probably shouldn't have any closing remarks in this one anyway. Ahem.
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